Saturday, June 18, 2011

Simultaneous Relief and Sadness

Oh my goodness is she talking. The other day Ava commented that, "Daddy put peanut butter on Ava's really really big pancake." That's a 10 word sentence coming from my little girl who's only 27 months old. It is such a relief. 6 months ago she had only three words in her vocabulary and couldn't imitate. Now she's talking in multi-word sentences. Obviously her language is fine.


More and more, I can't understand her at all. I'm pretty good if she's talking about something immediate and in front of us (like Daddy and the pancakes). If I have some context and we can see and point at it I can understand most of what she has to say. But if she's talking about anything else I'm clueless. You often can't understand a word of what she's saying. If she starts rattling off her opinion of a tv show I haven't watched or telling me about something she did at her grandparents' house I often have no idea.

As you would expect for Childhood Apraxia of Speech, the longer the utterance, the less you can understand. It's killing me. She has so much to say. Her little mind wants to tell stories. She wants to engage in back and forth conversation. Instead she says something which I hear as, "Garble, garble, garble, garble, garble" and I just look at her and reply, "Uh huh sweetie." And then I try to change the subject. Sometimes I say, "I'm sorry, sweetheart, Mama didn't understand you. Can you tell me again?" But I only do that when I think I have some chance of getting it. Otherwise, she just gets frustrated at trying to tell me over and over unsuccessfully.

I know we're working as fast as we can. I know she's made phenomenal progress in a relatively short time. I know she can communicate so much more than before. But honestly, I feel that it is terribly unfair that she's worked so hard, she's finally got so much to say and is actually trying to say it, and she still can't communicate successfully much of the time with her loved ones. That sucks.


  1. I feel that pain. I don't know how to make it better. But I do love hearing her get excited and trying to share.

  2. I know exactly how you feel! We are understanding our daughter less and less but it's because she's talking so much more. Context is so important. I can really tell how much I need context when I'm talking to her on the phone. It's almost impossible to understand her! However, I am thankful that I can talk to her on the phone. It was not so long ago that it would not even have been possible.

  3. I love what we do have (any talking at all)! I'm just impatient for being able to understand her better. Now that she's trying to share her thoughts I really want to understand them. :-) Thanks for sharing your common experience.


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